Wow. I think if I remember correctly the last time I talked to you I was dancing in an elf hat under a mirrored globe with my family. I think Tony Manero even showed up for a few dances. Ahhhh..... good times....good times.....Oh, yes. I was feeling good.... even by Friday. Making plans for the weekend. Extra shopping was to be fit in somewhere. Finishing up some extra gifts for friends. I even said yes to a last minute Etsy order for a personalized snowflake! What the heck! I was feeling just fine. The only problem was, that it wasn't me feeling fine. It was the decadron talking....."A barn raising on Saturday night? Sure, I'm there!"
Here's the last picture taken of me of me before the big chemo crash of 2008.....
My friend Chris was in town from Tennessee and we all met for brunch at Mimi's Cafe. Collectively, we have all known each other for over 20 years and there was no way I was going to miss this lunch. If I miss out on things like this, it's as if the terrorist won. However, my best friend Annette made it quite clear she did not want me dry heaving next to her while she enjoyed her mardi gras omlette and muffin. I was prepared though, and I smuggled in my own ginger ale. Slowly, but surely I felt the energy fizz from me like a deflated balloon. We had a great time and drove everyone around us nuts with our laughing and talking. But as we all know, all good things must come to an end. As Annette and I walked back to the car, she realized I was fading fast. While approaching the car, we noticed that we were blocked in by a woman who was rummaging in her trunk going through bags of clothing and what-nots for some homeless guys standing next to her.
Ok. Let me just say for the record, before someone slams me for for being the grinch who stole the homeless guys' Christmas, prior to being chaos extraordannaire, I used to work as a director of programs for the homeless for a number of years. I worked closely with them. Spent Christmas Eve every year with them after planning the holiday dinner. I get it.
With that said, I can not stand when people feel compelled to hold up an entrance to a busy mall (for all you San Diego folks out there I have two words for you and you will completely understand....Mission Valley.) on the last Saturday of holiday shopping 10 feet away from a busy intersection blocking in the people who are parked, as well as, blocking the people coming and going because said do-gooder is attempting to sort the pants from the shirts to some homeless guy who frankly just wants a couple of bucks anyway and then get all snippy about it when you politely ask her to park in the empty parking spot that is right next to her car. The parking spot that you know was there when she pulled in because it was empty. And, unless a car equipped with helicopter rotorblades was there previously, you know said do-gooder car could have parked there. But, then again, had she parked conveniently for all, she would not have been able to put on the "obvious display" of goodwill towards "homeless" man show for all the greedy consumers trying to buy that last minute gift card from Borders.
The reason I was so irritated by it was, beside the fact I felt like throwing up and passing out, I can all but guarantee she would not be out there on say, June 3rd making a big ass production about giving some homeless guy a pair of socks. I'm quite sure, based on my years of experience, this is her once a year Christmas feel good project for which she is going to get the most bang for her feel good buck. Because trust me, if this was someone who was doing this all the time she would be tucked to the side quietly taking care of business for the guys. No need for a big production. No need for a show of selflessness. And, certainly no need to be incredibly rude with both words and actions to two gals who wanted to get out of their parking spot. You could actually tell the homeless guy was embarrassed by it....
So after about 10 minutes of waiting, Annette rushed me home where I walked through the door, took out my contacts, put on my pajamas, and went to bed for 2 days straight.
The end.
Well , at that point, it felt like the end because I was so tired. It was all I could do to lift my head off the pillow. Yay for Cosme and my mom who took care of everything around me while I slept. I actually emerged from bedroom on Monday so I could spend a little more time with my friend Chris before she headed back to Tennessee. Unfortunately, upon waking on Monday, my back was extreme pain from my neck to the base of my back.
I spoke with my doctor and described to him in excruciating detail the pain. I asked him "So what do you think it is?!?!" Scared it was some rare, little known side effect from the chemo that renders patients useless, I eagerly awaited his professional response....which was....
"I have no idea." Turns out after talking with him, my nurse and my best friend Gail, we figured out it was my back spasming after weeks of getting ready for a craft fair, untold amounts of tension and stress combined with laying in bed for 2 days. The result of all of which was a back that was rebelling against its environment. I guess I can understand that. I think, however, before the next round, I'm going to be a bit more prepared with some back stretches, yoga and massage.
Despite all that, my Christmas wish was granted. I felt well enough to enjoy both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with my family.
Christmas Day was spent in pajamas (and for some of us, inside out), eating, relaxing, building Lego sets and playing with "Action Canyon Thomas"
Some even took a nap.......
They don't call it "Action" Canyon for nothing!
All in all I couldn't have asked for more. I'm feeling good and don't go back for treatment until the 7th. So I'm looking forward to some fun times with the boys, cleaning out my craft room and enjoying life.
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! Here's looking forward to a Great New Year!! Talk to you soon! Karin
